MARY GIUFFRE: I'm not a big fan of HOPE. I can feel you shutting down, but hear me out.

At a time in my life when I was doing everything I could just to put one foot in front of the other everyday, I spent some time on retreat in Northern Ontario with TwoBears, an Abenaki Shaman who set me straight when it comes to HOPE.

While in the depths of despair about my life and where I might end up if I continued on my then chosen path I expressed to him how I hoped and prayed I could turn things around.

His response was blunt: "HOPE has a hole in it." I was a bit taken back so he explained further while writing the word in the sand. "It's obvious. Just looking at it. See - there's a big open space through the middle." He put his finger in the 'O'. "Very very easy for energy to slip right through there. The word has no strength. No substance."

After sleeping on the concept and still not getting it, I approached him rather indignantly the next morning. "Well if I don't get to have any HOPE what the hell's the answer."

"TRUST. In my language there is no word for HOPE. We use the word TRUST instead. TRUST is the connection between the Creator and man, between heaven and earth. You can see it very clearly in the English words. TRUST is built around the word US but HOPE has a hole in it! Every time you want to use the word HOPE replace if with TRUST and you'll notice a difference."

Let's put it to the test.

"I hope I get that raise I deserve!"

For me this statement is so much more positive and powerful when HOPE is changed to TRUST.

"I TRUST I'll get that raise I deserve!" It doesn't leave room for an ounce of doubt!

I have avoided using that word for more than ten years now as I truly see the concept of HOPE as a negative one and I recently heard this opinion reinforced by, Deepak Chopra. In a television debate with a Spiritual sceptic Dr. Chopra stated very clearly, "HOPE is a desperate act." This is exactly how I see it.

When we HOPE for an outcome we put ourselves in a continual state of HOPE. It's rather like wanting to want. The energetic cycle is continuous.

TRUST on the other hand carries a confident energy that pledges a desired result. When we TRUST something will happen, we can feel confident in knowing that we've put our order out to the universe and that the result is assured. I've come to know TRUST as Spiritual practice, as it enhances and encourages my faith in the Divine in all things.

Jan 30, 2012 - 2:41 PM

Mary Giuffre -

I'm very sorry you had to experience this in your life Rob. A very brave decision. But it seems you trusted in something greater than ourselves as you knew hope was in vain...As Deepak Chopra said "Hope is a desperate act."
The divine part of self knew...and trusted...
Additionally we can not decide the fate of another and our 'hoping' won't change what that person came here to do...

Jan 30, 2012 - 2:40 PM

Rob Abdul -

But Mary, isn't trust simply denial where all we can do is hope?

From personal experience: I had to switch off a life supply machine to a loved one. I knew the outcome. I hoped it would not be. What will exchanging "hope" for "trust" do in that context ?

Jan 30, 2012 - 2:39 PM

Mary Giuffre -

I love the words intend and direction...control though can become too all consuming for me...it's something I've been working on surrendering for a very long time :)

Jan 29, 2012 - 8:07 AM

Rob Abdul -

Many years back at school my teachers were not happy with me when I would say "I hope to". Rather they got me to say "I intend to".

Hope to for me means no control; where as intending means I have control & direction.

Jan 19, 2011 - 7:40 AM

Mary Giuffre -

Hi Lynn ~ Thanks for your comment. I love the depth of your consideration of the actual words. This has never occurred to me...now I'll be looking at all kinds of words!
When it comes to LOVE and SOUL based on the teaching from Two-Bears I would say that it is the meaning/intention behind the words. If you consider the word 'chair' it is different in every language. Regardless it's something you sit on :)
Don Miguel & Don Jose Ruiz speak of this in 'the Fifth Agreement'.

Jan 18, 2011 - 12:43 PM

S. Lynne Horton -

Thank you for pointing me to this article Mary. What an interesting perspective. It made me start thinking about other words. MIND centers around "I" and HEART denotes listening with "hear" ...
I only need to reconcile two other words that seem to have a hole, LOVE and SOUL, but maybe those just have circles that hold others.
Again, it's all about our peceptions, right? Changing our thinking so that the reflection is only positive.

Jan 9, 2011 - 8:43 AM

Mary Giuffre -

Nathan ~

So very sorry for your loss. I know in my heart that the twist and turns life provides are meant as opportunities to recognize our own true greatness, pushing us to further align with our passions.
The cosmos is always as kind as we allow it to be. Our perceptions ~ thoughts about every event ~ are what either propels us forward in a positive loving way or drags us into the mud.
Sending you love, love, love for the healing of yourself and your family.

~ Mary & the FS Team.

Jan 9, 2011 - 7:33 AM

Nathan -

My son recently died, Mary. He lived a life in care due to mental health issues and latterly acquired brain damage due to a suicide attempt. I always hoped he would live to have a more fulfilling life. There was a lot of trust and effort in that hope. Now I guess I'm sort of lost for words. I'm not particularly spiritual, but I still have trust and hope that there is a cosmos out there that will be kinder to him.