Many go through life with blinders on when it comes to giving and receiving love. They feel it it's love only if presented to them in a certain way, at a certain time by a certain someone. When it doesn't arrive in that perfect package they either refuse it or don't recognize it as being genuine or belonging to them.
How many relationships crumble because the partners are expecting each other to act in a particular manner, say just the right things or are doing acts of kindness for the other with those invisible strings attached wanting something in return? When we limit our ways of receiving love we often miss the golden opportunities and unique venues presents itself to us.
First we need to be genuine in our giving of love to those around us. When we feel disappointed, lonely or unloved, we need to stop and think about the ways in which we have been sending love to others. Has it been with the intent of getting something back in return or was it for the higher good or out of true compassion? After all, just as we are waiting for love to come our way, there is someone else waiting too. We could be the one they are waiting for. We hold within us the gift of a simple hello, a kind word or thoughtful deed. When we are lonely or feeling unloved we need to take a good look at our lives and see how we treat others throughout our day. Are we giving, caring and acting out of concern or are we just going through the motions and keeping to ourselves, grumbling that we have to be around anyone at all?
Perhaps someone who claimed to love us but instead used us, abused us or refused to show any affection or concern towards us at all, has fooled us in the past. These memories can scar our sense of feeling safe in opening up to receive love, of feeling worthy to accept love and even our ability to be loved. This is where inner child work is needed in order for us to find our true self and learn to love ourselves.
We will do well to remember that we are the creators of the reality in our world, as all things begin with our thoughts: our thoughts about others, the world, the Divine and mostly about ourselves. Do we feel we are worthy of love? The answer should be a resounding YES WE ARE WORTHY! It is by loving ourselves that we will find the strength to break down the shield that we have built around our hearts and take that chance at accepting even the smallest of gestures from someone and being free to give love as well. How else will we know we are loved?
Are we open to accept the little moments throughout the day when love comes are way? It could be as simple as someone holding the door for us, a smile from a stranger, someone offering a seat on the bus then engaging in conversation, a joke shared, a wild flower thoughtfully picked and presented, a hug from a child, a wet juicy dog kiss, or the soft purring of a kitten as it snuggles up on our lap. Simple moments done without the expectation of anything in return are all signs that we are worthy of love.
When we are the ones who freely give of our time and energy to help others whether it is through teaching, volunteering, baking up a batch of cookies for any occasion, or the work we do, it is often difficult for us to accept even a small compliment. Compliments are love coming to us as beautiful unopened gifts that are wrapped in love just for us. By refusing it we rob the giver their opportunity to show love and we deny ourselves a moment of being open to receive love. We need to be mindful not to make the common mistake of down playing a compliment by putting ourselves down or saying, "You shouldn't have”, but rather graciously accept this wonderful present with a “Thank you”. Simply embrace the moment and allow its positive energy to flow freely between the giver and the receiver. Remember how good we feel when we are serving others. Do we want to deprive someone of this same feeling by refusing their acts of kindness when given to us? No, we need to encourage one another to be open to receive love in order to pass it on.
Let's make today the day we not only give love but also throw open our heart gates to let love in. May we notice it in everyone we meet, every smile, every hello, every sunrise and sunset, every ray of sunshine, autumn breeze, and compliment that comes our way. May we grant someone the opportunity to be the giver of love and may we permit ourselves to be the receiver of such a fine present. We are all worthy so open up and take love in.
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